Jersey Tortoise Takeover — Big Cycling Challenge!
I often set myself little challenges when on my annual holiday to Jersey (now more routine than a holiday) and having smashed through the 12 Parish Challenge, the Pub Crawl Challenge and the Complete Cycle Challenge, this year’s challenge really went up a few notches: Find the 50 Big Tortoises hidden around Jersey in a single day!
For those not so closely acquainted with curious Jersey life, we are of course talking about the Jersey 2023 Tortoise Takeover event. There are unique and meaningfully decorated tortoises of varying sizes scattered throughout the island in carefully chosen locations, each hand-painted by artists from Jersey, England and The Netherlands with themes to highlight the importance of nature and conservation. You download an App to help you find them and then register each discovery on it, reading about the artist and understanding the theme and importance of it each time.
This is a charity event. After the search, all tortoises will be auctioned and the proceeds will go to Durrel conservation projects at Jersey Zoo. Whether you are participating in the hunt or not, bidding for your favourite tortoise for your garden or not, we are all encouraged to donate, as I will do at the end of this read for each tortoise that I find in my challenge. Furthermore, I will tell you which is my favourite tortoise and will update this blog once I know what it goes for.
Let’s go!
1. The Jersey Royal, St. Martins
The mission started at 07:00 on Tuesday 1st August 2023 (getting up at 06:30 I may add from my (now 2nd) favourite Rozel Bay Camping) in St. Martins with high hopes that the day would stay dry (it did not). In a small park that I had never explored before, I registered my first tortoise.
This tortoise focuses on the four seasons and the sustainable farming industry in Jersey. Nice and bright colours to help wake me up.
2. Gerald And Other Animals, Jersey Zoo
I had decided on my route the day before. Anti-clockwise around the island with strategic punches into the centre where necessary. We go West towards the focus of this entire tortoise-torture for me: Jersey Zoo.
Kinda fading into the pavement this one (maybe there was some sunshine before I arrived?) and I’d have liked to see the yellow a bit brighter. This guy is a tribute to Gerald Durrell and the animals he studied.
3. Les Papillotes, Bouley Bay
I can’t tell you how relieved I was when I got there and I did not have to cycle down into the bay to find this guy! Up top, but hidden in a lay-by, he was found.
This guy focuses on the diversity of butterflies on the island. See them all at Jersey Zoo’s Butterfly Kaleidoscope. There are butterflies hidden on his stomach because I guess Olivia Grimes ran out of space on the shell and legs. I’d have put a little one on his nose!
4. A Day At The Zoo, Trinity Parish Hall
I’ve no idea why this one wasn’t at the Zoo, but it wasn’t. A very intricate and detailed tortoise it was though.
This tortoise focuses on experiences that your children might enjoy whilst out at the zoo. My son enjoyed the pink chickens with their long legs, which you can actually see just above his left eye!
5. Puffling, Sorrel Point
I really wanted to see this one, but it was missing!
There are just 8 puffins left on Jersey and each was depicted on this tortoise. To be honest, I never knew there were any Puffins here at all and that just makes me want to see this tortoise even more!
5. The Tortoisphere, Les Mouriers (Devil’s Hole)
This one was fun to find because it was a decent cycle from Puffling and it was on a cliff path protected by a herd of sheep. The cycle from Sorrel to the Devil's Hole is fabulous, through some tiny lanes lined with flowers and streams. You can also take the cliff path, and because I did not, I ended up having to go back on myself along the path to find this guy — well worth it!
The meaning of this one was a bit too abstract for me at the time, possibly due to still lacking any breakfast. But when you get close you can see the intertwining of animals, plants, seas, space… creating a “Tortoisphere”, I think!
And with no breakfast inside me… a proper cycle ahead now to the western edge of the island will be a challenge!
6. In The Stars, Grosnez Castle
I was looking forward to nailing one of the most remote of the tortoises, and I do like this spot. It’s a windy spot and you can see some huge container ships sail by in the distance. Some of the most beautiful sunsets you’ll also witness here — but it becomes quite scary after dark on your own!
It was now 09:30 and I’d done 6/50. In the planning stage, I had aimed for 10:00 here, so pleasantly pleased with my progress (still no breakfast).
Another abstract tortoise message and as my journey continued I did think some of the reasoning became quite tenuous. Anyway, this guy represents the “universal” efforts of Jersey Zoo and Durrell Conservation. I don’t really like the replacement of his eyes with stars. The rest of him is lovely.
7. Kintsugi, Jersey Airport
And my first coffee! But it was weak :(
A little surreal coming to an airport to look for a tortoise. On every single visit to an airport prior to this without exception, it has been to fly somewhere or to pick up someone that has flown from somewhere. Nevertheless, here I was, staring at a tortoise.
Another tortoise respecting the work of Durrell, a fairly consistent theme throughout this journey.
8. Bright Spark, El Tico, St Ouens
I knew this tortoise would be a tough one to reach. I’m in Jersey during the worst summer weather I’ve ever experienced here where the St. Ouen winds are now gales and the rain is a constant pest in your face as you fight forward on your bike.
A fantastic fact learned for me here as I was not aware of it at all (another clever tortoise was though… do read on) is that Jersey beaches can glow during the summer months! This is a tortoise inspired by this bioluminescent phenomenon.
intermission: It’s on my journey to my tortoise number #9 that I finally got breakfast. It was around 11:00 at it was yet another fabulous feed at the fantastic The Hideout, recently pushed down the slipway by the new Nude Dunes restaurant. Breakfast was excellent! First-class sausage and egg in Portuguese roll. Luncheon at Nude Dunes a few days before was “OK”. A salad that you would get from Itsu, Island Poké or similar, yet 3 times the price. The views from both establishments are stunning.
9. Margo, Corbière Lighthouse
I took the cliff path from the end of St. Oeuns around the headland hoping to dodge the worst of the hills. It was pretty and enjoyable, but I did not avoid the inevitable climb. The lighthouse itself is a descent from the cliff to reach — but don’t do that! Look behind you from the road! That will save you some energy and not dent your morale.
I particularly like the message of this tortoise: “You cannot begin to preserve any species of animal unless you preserve the habitat in which it dwells”: bang on! And wonderful colours too.
10. In A Beautiful World We All Have A Home, Railway Walk, Red Houses
A slight dash inland to pat this tortoise on the nose. Past my favourite Waitrose, and when I got there, realised I could have taken the Railway Walk cycle path all the way from Corbière to this next catch instead of the A13.
A great name for this tortoise, and worthy of a Boards of Canada tune. But more relevantly, universal housing and protecting our environment are intertwined on many levels, and that is what this tortoise is all about.
11. Terrace Tortoise, St Brelade Garden
This one really caught my eye. I liked the colours, then looking more closely it is a panoramic of one of my favourite places: Gorey! So, just like the Day in the Zoo not being in the Zoo, why is this in St. Brelades? Note the wonderful beach in the background.
A tortoise totally inspired by Gorey. I think this one is focused on the community rather than the Zoo… not sure. Regardless, I liked it. This is the first one I’d consider bidding on.
12. Astral Race, Ouaisné Bay
Firstly, if not from Jersey, to pronounce the name of this bay best think of John Wayne before opening your mouth: John “Wayne-ay” Bay.
He’s also a bit hidden! And by the way, due to time constraints, this is the first ever time ever that I have been to Ouaisné Bay and not had a pint at the Old Smugglers Inn — and that spans over a decade. These damn tortoises may be the death of me…
Another left-field message from this big thinker: “Unless we change this perpetual race, I see it ending in despair”. He’s talking to the hare, of course.
13. Your Tern, Noirmont
The cycle up from “wayne-ay” isn’t that hard. The cycle down is fast, and although up is slow, it’s not hard. My initial plan pencilled in a pint at the quaint Portelet Inn and a pizza at the picturesque Porteley Bay Cafe, however, I arrived before opening time and had eaten a late breakfast — I pushed forward.
This tortoise has his eyes on the birds! With a nice pun in the name “Your Tern”, said the Tern to the human, to start looking after us better.
15. Berry Good Tortoise, St Aubin
I’ve always loved the glide down towards St Aubin. Not only because the village is so familiar to me from watching Bergerac since the 80s but also the buzz from the restaurants and bars. The beach tucked in behind the Royal Yacht Club is nice to swim from.
This is a tortoise who enjoys his food — he’s covered in it (even worse than my son at dinnertime!). Probably a message about fresh food and sustainability somewhere here… maybe… but I think he appreciates the fab restaurants in St. Aubin just as much as I do!
intermi1ssion: Still full of confidence in my progress and timing, I looked again at the map. It was around 12:30 and I suddenly realised that I had underestimated the tortoise-dash across St. Aubins Bay due to the 4 awkwardly placed inland tortoises almost spanning its entire length. I abandoned all plans for a civilised glass of white wine and put my head down, bike in gear and prepared for a really uncomfortable next couple of hours.
16. Shell’s Angel, Bel Royal
A quick strike on the St. Aubins coastline before heading up the hill northwards: Biker Tortoise!
No real message from this tortoise, just making the most out of a great pun in the name.
17. Shell-f Reflection, Le Moulin de Quétivel
I got to this shiny guy at around 13:00. Efficiency was key now — gotta move on! I started to affectionately pat each one on the nose from here on in to say goodbye after reading their little plaques.
Another pun is used here when naming. I tend to avoid my reflection as it’s not that great, and it certainly wasn’t on this day after 6 hours of windswept cycling. The message from this tortoise was to appreciate the beauty of our surroundings, and for me to get a haircut.
18. Tonka, St Peter’s Valley Mill Pond
I was cycling so fast that I almost zoomed past this one. There was also a rooster high up in a tree cock-a-doodle-doing really loud and the tourists at this spot were torn between the giant painted tortoise and the rooster in the tree — not something you see every day, but this is Jersey!
This tortoise is inspired by the magic of nature’s camouflage and so it’s no coincidence then that I almost cycled past it!
19. Passion, Moignard Liberation Garden — St Lawrence
To get to St. Lawrence from St. Peter’s Valley you must go up out of the valley, experience a nice glide down to the War Tunnels, but then up up up as the climb east from the tunnels is surprisingly steep, long and tough; it’s still not quite 14:00 yet, so not panicking.
This tortoise has clearly just arrived from the Galápagos Islands and the passionflower, which is the flower of those, is depicted all over the body and shell.
20. Home For Even The Smallest, Waterworks Valley
This was another tough cycle and the valleys and cliffs of Jersey take no prisoners. I expect this guy to have the lowest hit count as it is certainly not on a tourist path. I absolutely loved the cycle through the valley to find him and is a highlight of this challenge. Halfway through the valley, about a dozen swans and another dozen ducks had completely blocked a lane of the B-road, just sitting there relaxing in the rain, and could not care less about the mayhem they were causing with the cars queuing to get around them! Great that no drivers tried to frighten them off the road — this was their territory!
Another name I really like. And another tortoise respecting Durrell, this time for his work with… tiny frogs! Look closely and you’ll see the tadpoles.
21. Eco Ninja, Coronation Park (Millbrook)
Back on the coastline (and flat land!) and hoping to claw back some time, I could only spend a few minutes with this tortoise. Don’t worry, we are far from exhausting the tortoise-related puns, similes and cultural comparisons, and this Ninja Tortoise brought a smile to my face.
I think the idea is that this tortoise is here to protect species from extinction. As far as I’m aware there are only 4 Ninja Turtles left in the wild…
22. Lucky One, Coronation Park (Millbrook)
Very relieved to grab another tortoise in exactly the same (small) park! Aren’t I the lucky one?
A mix of Jersey wildlife and Chinese culture on this one. Not sure if there is a message here!
23. Helier’s Rock, Old Station Café bunker
One of the 5 easy-pickings along the cycle superhighway stretching from St. Aubins to St. Helier. By now I was fully adjusted to the tortoise etiquette where people get out of the way whilst you take your photos, then you quickly get out of the way for the next family to take theirs. As a weathered lone cyclist in his 40s, I wonder what they were thinking of me! Regardless, I pressed on.
Inspired by the beheaded patron saint of Jersey (read more about that here) this granite tortoise reflects the rock colours you can admire across the island. And there are some fascinating stones to find across the beaches with bright and bizarre colours!
24. Terry — The Turtleneck Tortoise, Les Jardins de la Mer
We are now in St. Helier, and a huge relief to me that it is still just 14:30. At this point, I mistakenly believed it was all downhill from here on in with just easy ones to get, and I’d rattle them off and be done by 18:00 — wrong! However, St. Helier is flat and there are around 10 here that will make my tally look a bit more respectable and build my confidence back up.
It seems so obvious now, but Jersey fabric is from… Jersey. This tortoise sports original “knit fabric” Jersey designs. To further your curiosity, Jersey fabric originates from the Middle Ages. The next time you put on a Jersey, do think of this lovely tortoise and consider how many other unusual things about Jersey you still have to learn (have you tried the black butter yet?).
25. Bieau P’tit Jèrri, Elizabeth Marina
Shooting just around the corner, we are really making progress now.
The name was the most interesting feature here. The message of the tortoise is pretty much just “Visit Jersey Zoo and see the tortoises there”, but the name is interesting because of the language it is written in Jèrriais.
I’ve cycled roads in North Jersey so narrow cars cannot go down them but there are still old houses dotted along them — now this is proper hidden Jersey — and I bet that is where the language is still spoken.
26. Aasimah, Marina Gardens
Confidence grows by the minute, and so does the tortoise count.
Aboriginal Australian inspired. I’m beginning to think that there are no strict rules at all for what artists can do with their tortoises. This one is to protect and guide us, and we all need that at times. Thank you, Aasimah.
27. Cosmic Connection, Elizabeth Terminal
All the art was on this guy’s shell and he does apologise for not smiling at you, but he really wanted you to see his bum!
For those readers that have been into space (which I expect is no one of you), you have felt a connection with Earth and the Universe that everyone else has not experienced. For those readers that have not been into space (which I expect is every one of you) this tortoiseshell is your next best thing.
28. Be The Change, Trenton Square
A tortoise every 5 minutes at the moment, which beats the pace along the North of the island, which was closer to 1 an hour.
Another Jersey Zoo-themed tortoise, bringing your attention to the conservation of frogs and reptiles. We saw some weird and wonderful frogs on our visit. This tortoiseshell colour was supposed to respond to the heat of your hands… unfortunately, he did not respond to mine. Probably exhausted by everyone else before me.
29. It’s A Rave Dave, Liberty Wharf
Loved being greeted by this one! I have taken some close-ups of this to try and create a wallpaper for my laptop. Interesting to see how this gets related to conservation… unless it’s for mushrooms?
If you read the official page for this tortoise, then you’ll be happy to read that the only message here is a tribute to “happiness”. I wonder what the kids have been asking their parents once found this happy tortoise?
30. Discoveries With Darwin, Liberation Square
Almost central St. Helier now (i.e. “town” as it’s called here) and I am at 30 tortoises after 8 hours hunting… oh dear, It’s going to be a late one!
This tortoise is nodding his head towards Darwin this time, not Durrell. Consistent with the theme of understanding species so that we can conserve their habitat.
31. Breathe, Broad Street
Dangerously close to a Mcdonalds', I’d have thought that Not Fast Food would have been placed here. The tortoises placed in the centre of town are basically here just for parents to tell their children not to climb on them.
The message here is for us to slow down, appreciate life around us and feel the breeze: as a Londoner, I like that message!
32. Everything Is Connected, Charing Cross
Not long now (I hope) and I can cycle straight out of town!
The lesson here is that we need to support biodiversity with a holistic approach. Since everything is connected, you have to heal the whole and not just a part. How the stripes represented this, I was not sure. And with rain approaching and legs failing, I needed to move on.
33. Porcelain Tortoise, The Cenotaph
St. Helier really does have a lot of tortoises! I’ve walked past this monument a few times before but never really engaged my brain to appreciate what it was there for. The tortoise, however, got my attention instantly. Bringing some loving colours to the memory of the fallen may actually inspire new generations to learn and not just pass it by.
Again, the placement of the tortoises confuses me: porcelain originates from China, Cenotaph remembers World War fallen and furthermore, I see nothing here for Jersey Zoo. Confused by this one. No message, just tortoise fun.
34. Rivers Of Colour, Millenium Park
Almost 16:00 and the first drops of rain are falling. The vision of finishing this challenge in the dark, soaking wet and cold, is fast becoming a reality.
This is a really nice tortoise on the eye. Made me think of worms, but these in fact represent rivers. The more faded out the river, the more faded the biodiversity is. We are fading out.
35. Dodo Tortoise, West Centre
Not a glamorous location for a tortoise with such a clear-cut message. And yes, we are clearly still in St. Helier.
The dodo has had its name used in vain since the 17th Century. It is also the symbol of Durrell Conservation, i.e. Jersey Zoo. I don’t think that I need to spell out the message from this tortoise.
36. Not Fast Food, Queen Street
Ah, the tortoise that escaped from McDonalds!
The message I instantly saw here was the fun joke and pun referencing our ghastly “fast food” culture, but I then focused on the first word: “not”. I would never consider eating a tortoise but I regard other species in a different light (or plate?) — why is that?
37. Stay Gold, La Colomberie
Endless St. Helier tortoises, but the tally is rising at the fastest rate all day.
Sorry Abi Overland, no real message here so I just snapped and ran.
38. Jersey Willow, Royal Square
So this is where the police HQ was in the first series of Bergerac. Also where Charles II was crowned King during the English Civil War, which is how it got its name; what’s wrong with Bergerac Square?
This one is nice, not just because of the pleasant colours, but also because of the scenes it depicts across its back from across Jersey. One to put on your mantlepiece.
39. Gaia, King Street
There may be no escape from St. Helier! I’ve seen loads of toddlers enjoy these though during my pass-through, so I can understand the concentration of tortoises here. The colours and images on this guy must have created many a smile, which is great.
His message is about how all ecosystems must be perfectly balanced with each other, and as we interfere with one, we unintentionally wreak havoc with them all. To be fair, he’s right, but I just like the fun animals and colours.
40. Keep Going, Keep Growing, Howard Davis Park
Just to make clear, in case you are wondering, I stopped patting the tortoises on their nose soon after I entered St. Helier’s “intense tortoise patch” due to the number of people staring. I started again just after. But you just wanna pat this nose, don’t you?
“Keep Going, Keep Growing” is a great name and a great philosophy for us all as we drag ourselves through our own lives and careers. Tortoises, however, do have one key advantage over us… not being burdened by a mortgage!
41. Stained Glass Companion, Havre Des Pas
I’m finally on my way out of town! I have cycled past this lido numerous times and was really happy that a tortoise has now called me into it. This is an area of sea captured at high tide to create a safe swimming space. Also, there is a safe bar.
I can appreciate the resemblance between stained glass windows and the tortoiseshell, so this tortoise was nice to take a breather with. As a Cathedral fan almost as much as a Jersey fan (and tortoise fan), I have witnessed in Canterbury just how old these windows can be… so why can’t we protect our habitats with the same care?
42. Shelltastic, Le Mare
Another shell pun! I may publish a definitive list. Rain is now depressing me and the wind is picking up. I was not aware at this point, but an unusually large storm was about to land.
Another tenuous link between the art and the message from Shelltastic. I do agree with him though that all creativity has value.
43. Maurice (Round Island), Le Hocq
It was raining and there was an old fellow seemingly intent on getting in the way of every photo I would try and take. I took around 30 photos and this is one of the few where Maurice’s nose thankfully beat the old fellow’s game.
Back to a message from Durrell! This beautiful tortoiseshell is a symbol of conservation optimism, and I’m sorry I didn’t take a photo of his back, because that would have avoided all the old man trouble of the headshot!
44. Luminous Luna, La Rocque Pier
I’ve swam here once before and it was a real pleasure. You can’t see from the photo, but it is pissing down. Still, there were a group of sea swimmers just on the other side of this tortoise.
This is the other tortoise that I said knew about the bioluminescent worms in the southern harbours. As a result of a chemical reaction in the worms, the harbour area is illuminated some evenings creating a crazy glowing display. Now, this is a mission for me to see on my next visit, and I feel that is exactly the message from this reptile: Explore Jersey!
45. My Neighbour Tortoro, Queen’s Valley Reservoir
This one will be hard to take for John Nettles because his quite lovely home from the first few series was submerged by the creation of this reservoir (actively mentioned just a single time in Bergerac, and bitterly). Queen’s Valley is where John wanted to settle in Jersey, but can you believe it… his permanent residency was refused!
More promoting a film than nature conservation in Jersey, I instantly liked this image but was a little put out to learn that the message is to appreciate your surroundings with a “child-like wonder”, as I reacted almost exactly the same as the 2 children who discovered him at the same time.
46. Eden, Gorey Promenade
Notably, one of Jersey's most famous villages where you cannot buy a pint of real ale: Gorey. It’s such a landmark, and after 10 years of cycling through it, you still cannot buy a Liberation. The Dolphin makes up for this with local dynamism and is an honest, decent boozer — but I simply don’t know what to drink there! But this time, we are here for tortoises!
This is (almost) unique because the shell is alive (and touchable) with a jungle on its shell. Really impressed by this tortoise. Not many artists thought outside of the shell, but Caroline Parrott did. Can you imagine this in your garden? I suspect the underlying message here is that Caroline is immensely talented and to buy her stuff because I’ve cycled Jersey for 13 years and not seen any jungles yet.
intermission: Fingerprint sensors on phones have yet to adapt to circumstances when you are so wet, you wrinkle.
47. Sanctuary, Mont Orgueil Castle
When I first visited this castle in around 2013 there was a box of knights and maids costumes for kids to dress up in before running around the castle in. And you basically had the freedom of the castle and could explore it as you wished. Things changed somewhat ten years later in 2023.
Symbolising (somehow) the strong relationship between Durrell and Anne, Princess Royal. I can appreciate that she is a valued supporter, but how does this tortoise relate to Anne? You could make the case that this tortoise relates to pretty much anyone.
48. Harriet, Archirondel
My God, the rain was torrential here. Once again, there were sea swimmers who saw far far beyond the rain. Personally, I was at a low. The really kind people at the cafe here gave me a towel! I also bought a pint of cider. Harriet cheered me up also.
Another clear nod to Darwin, as Harriet was the name of his own personal tortoise. Now, that is a special thing, isn’t it… your Own Personal Tortoise. Harriet lived to 147, so be prepared to share.
49. Toadstooly Tortoise, St Catherine’s Woods
We are now at around 19:30 hours and 1.5 hours behind schedule, soaking wet, knackered and slightly intolerant. I had a brief moment of “**** this ****” after fighting 20 minutes uphill through the wind and rain, not really knowing where I am going, only to see the tortoise on the other side of the damn reservoir. I was looking over the water thinking that I cannot bear cycling back down to take the alternative path and would have thrown in the towel, had I not given it back to the kind people at The Driftwood Cafe.
Thankfully, there was a bridge. Regardless, I would have relentlessly cycled back, with only these last two to grab.
Another artist just expressing themself. It was heaving down with rain and I think this tortoise was enjoying it far more than I was. No message here again. This was a really tough cycle by the way, for no clear message, Marnie. Although I did learn that this is the only reservoir in Jersey that dogs can swim in.
50! Janvrin’s Tortoise, St Catherine’s Breakwater
The only tortoise to get a hug from me! And look… it’s still light! 20:10 to be precise.
It is (honestly) pure coincidence that on this 2023 visit to Jersey, I swam around the tower (depicted on his back) at Portelet Bay on my first day, at almost high tide (tearing muscles in both arms and shredding legs on hidden rocks, almost ruining my holiday), and now I see it again on my final tortoise — someone planned this torture for me!!!
So that is 13 hours of cycling, fasting, map-reading, panicking, shivering, and fighting wind and rain, for what…
For this.
That is a pound for each tortoise I found, plus one for the missing Puffin. My favourite is the last.
Job Done! Thank you, Tortoises.
Some feedback for the organisers.
- Too many “don’t climb/touch” signs — why not encourage that instead? build them to handle and encourage interaction. You have encouraged family bickering and standoffs instead as everyone wants to touch and explore these amazing tortoises!
- Interestingly, no tortoises with red squirrels, which is a no-brainer when we are focusing on conservation in Jersey — where is the tortoise with a Red Squirrel on its back?
- Make the locations make more sense relative to the art we see on the reptiles.
